It has been a very interesting week. Most are these days. It wasn’t because it has been snowing in
Atlanta, although that has created its own issues. No, what made this week interesting was the
extremes of networking results we encountered.
My team was reminded that not everyone is a viable networking
partner. That will never change.
While discussing our business development activities I
told a colleague about my progress with a new partner. This contact, John is a referral from an
associate who recently joined our team. John
owns a Professional Services Firm whose model is very complimentary to
ours. He is very personable and clearly understands
the benefits to networking. After three
visits to explore mutual interests and opportunities, with a handshake, we
agreed to work together to exchange leads and referrals. In fact, both of us have already made connections
on behalf of the other.
I then recapped a list of people I had contacted to set
up meetings in the coming weeks. When I
got to a specific name my colleague stopped me.
“Don’t expect any help from him.
He is funny about referrals.” In
other words, this person will accept your help, but don’t expect him to
reciprocate. I was a bit surprised, to
say the least. I was fascinated by my
colleagues’ recap of several encounters that made his point.
It is a sad part of life that not everyone is interested
in the give-and-take of effective networking.
Some people, albeit a small percentage from my experience, are about
taking, not giving. It may be conscious
or not, but not everyone is blessed with the networking gene. It just isn’t in their DNA. I have seen this phenomena all too often in
my work. I cannot count the number of
people who would not give me the time of day when I called on them, only to
find that I am their long-lost friend when they need my help. Clearly, not the norm. Over time it has been a source of
amusement. I have recognized this to be
a fact of life. It is a cost of doing
business. It’s not personal. I have long had the policy of helping these “long-lost
friends” as best as I can without expecting anything in return. Punishing bad behavior with equally bad
behavior is a poor business practice which likely leads to bad Karma. It’s not personal. I took my colleague’s admonition to heart but
still plan to follow through on our meeting.
Who knows, it might lead to some interesting intel.
In life, I have learned that I cannot expect everyone to
behave to my expectations. Networking is
no exception. So, when planning your
networking activities follow the 80/20 rule.
Focus on those people who are adept at networking and avoid the
takers. Help everyone you can without
expectation. If they do not reciprocate,
recognize their behavior for what it is, a cost of doing business. It isn’t personal.
Thank you for visiting my blog.
Your feedback helps me continue to publish articles that you want to read. Your input is very important to me so please leave a comment.
Jim Weber, President
New Century Dynamics Executive Search
www.newcenturydynamics.com
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